Towels, Forks, & a Well-Trained Cat

We recently returned from a family vacation in California during part of which we stayed with some close friends, and you could tell they had prepared for our visit.  The beds were clean and freshly made, there were clean towels folded neatly by the bed, and in the bathroom several small details had been paid attention to like extra tooth brushes, different soap options, etc.  We might consider these to be superficial, even expected preparations but they were simply the tip of the iceberg.  My wife has a long list of allergies including pet dandruff and our friends have a cat.  A well trained cat mind you.  They have trained their cat to give high fives, follow certain commands, and use the toilet instead of a litter box.  Yes, you read right, their cat uses the toilet and it just happened to be the toilet in the bathroom we were using.  So, they retrained their cat to use a different bathroom so my wife as it was put many times during our stay "wouldn't die".  Perhaps an overreaction but consider the time and energy that went into retraining the cat just to make sure my wife was comfortable and as healthy as possible.  If that's not enough, our friends even bought the laundry detergent they knew we used that was scentless and hypoallergenic so we could do laundry and again make sure my wife "wouldn't die".  If you've ever wondered what authentic hospitality looks like, this is it.  True hospitality goes beyond the tip of the iceberg to what's beneath by removing all doubt and making it clear to us that "we belong here".

Amy Oden describes this kind of hospitality as "gospel hospitality" which she defines as "God's welcome into abundant life, into God's own life."  Gospel hospitality is often the kind of hospitality that surprises us, that comforts us, that renews us, and that ultimately allows us to just be.  In a world ravaged by injustice, inequality, violence, and racism, gospel hospitality is the kind of hospitality that is missing and yet desperately needed.

In the book of Genesis, chapter 18, there is a story about a man named Abraham.  Abraham was probably a wealthy and educated man, originally from the Sumerian city of Ur.  Most importantly though, Abraham was the first of the patriarchs in the Old Testament as well as the founding father of three of the world's major religious traditions:  Judaism, Islam, and Christianity.  God had instructed Abraham to move to Canaan, the land God promised to give him and his offspring who would be more numerous than the grains of sand on the beach or the stars in the sky.  As Abraham's story unfolds you get the sense that he isn't completely convinced of God's promise, after all he and his wife Sarah don't have any children and it appears that Sarah is incapable of having children.  They relocate though, to a place called Mamre.  Mamre was an unremarkable place in Canaan that was probably nothing more than a small grove of trees.  While at Mamre though, Abraham and his wife Sarah have a remarkable experience when they welcome three strangers.  Abraham saw the strangers walking by while he was standing outside his tent watching the world go by and he ran out and practically begged them to stay.  He served them cakes made from the best flower, a calf who was good and tender, as well as curds and milk.  He also provided them with a spot in the shade to rest and water to wash their feet.  While the strangers ate they asked about Sarah (who was in the tent listening intently) and proclaim that they will return and when they do Abraham and Sarah will have a son.  Abraham and Sarah, who are well beyond child bearing years and yet had desperately wanted a son, had a hard time believing they were going to be parents.  In fact, Sarah laughs from behind the tent door.  One of the strangers though says, "Is anything to wonderful for the Lord?"

Is anything too wonderful for the Lord?  As readers of the story we know in advance that the strangers are really God in disguise and God's question becomes the essence of both the story and of gospel hospitality.  God asks Abraham, Sarah, and us to consider if there is anything beyond the love and power of God.  Is there anything that could separate us from God or leave God feeling as though we are imposing on Him in anyway?   God's question to Abraham and Sarah invite us to see and to hear God as a God of welcome, of hospitality, which is why the story of Abraham at Mamre is the story of hospitality in the Bible.  The story of Abraham at Mamre reminds us of who God is, of who we are supposed to be, and even gives us markers to keep us on track.  If you've ever gone hiking you may remember trails that were marked with different colors.  Each color representing a different trail and as long as you continued to see the same color, you knew you were on the right trail.  Much like following markers on a trail, the story of Abraham at Mamre has all the markers of hospitality.  Amy Oden describes the markers as:  Readiness (Abraham being outside the tent watching the world go by), Risk (Abraham running out and begging complete strangers to come rest and have a meal at his tent), Repentance (Abraham and Sarah turning and believing that they would in fact have a son), and Recognition (Abraham and Sarah eventually realizing it was God they were hosting and in turn realizing it was God hosting them by promising them a son).  As you may have noticed, some of these markers occur later but as long as we're continuing to see these markers we know we are on the right track.

The markers of hospitality also reminds us that hospitality works both ways.  It renews the lives of both the guest and the host, reminding them that they do in fact "belong here", whether that be Canaan, our friend's house, or wherever you might find belonging.  The absence of this kind of hospitality in the world is a tragedy because as Amy Oden says, "Gospel hospitality has always been at the heart of the Christian life.  God's welcome to every creature is a biblical proclamation and is the good news that we preach."  When we were staying with our friends in California they were ready for us which meant that once we arrived a space of belonging and renewal was created.  I remember at one point early on in our time with them they told us to essentially feel free to rummage through their cupboards to find what we need.  That's gospel hospitality in a nutshell.  Think about the trust and intimacy involved in giving someone permission to rummage through your cupboards.  Think about the comfort and freedom it gives the person rummaging!  It's risky sure, but it's also a great metaphor for the gospel.  By inviting us to rummage through their cupboards our friends are saying there are no secrets between us and that we are not an imposition.  In other words, both host and guest are welcome as they are without judgment.  That's how God welcomes us too.  We are not an imposition to God because nothing is too wonderful for God!

As Christ-followers we need to hear this because unlike Abraham, inviting others to rummage through our cupboards is something the church struggles with a great deal.  It isn't our secrets as much as it our propriety that prevents us from welcoming others freely and without judgment.  The church needs to learn how to welcome people as God welcomes us, freely and without judgment, reminding them that they are not an imposition to God nor the church.  That they in fact belong here. I feel very strongly that the church, if it can embrace and cultivate gospel hospitality, can lead the charge in healing our world.

Starting the week I invite you to check out my new podcast on hospitality:  Rummaging through the Cupboards - A Podcast on Hospitality in an Inhospitable World.  The podcast will involve interviews with professional and experienced people from different walks of life talking about hospitality, how they have experienced the markers of hospitality, and the impact it has had on their lives and the communities they are a part of.  The interviews will also contain ideas, resources, and experiences you can draw from and use in your own context.  My first two guests will be Barbara Wilson, Director of Collaboration & Community Partnerships for the Presbytery of Chicago, and Amy Oden, Professor of Early Church History and Spirituality at Saint Paul School of Theology of Oklahoma City University & Wesley Theological Seminary.  So, come check it out...we'll make sure you have extra towels but feel free to find the forks yourself.  After all you're not truly welcome unless you can rummage through cupboards!


Quotes & markers of hospitality taken from:  Amy Oden, “God’s Welcome: Hospitality for a Gospel-Hungry World (Cleveland, OH: The Pilgrim Press, 2008) pgs. 11 & 17-27